How Do Others View You?

What do people see when they look at you?

It’s a question most of us ponder from time to time. Though we shouldn’t worry about what others think, or their opinions of us, whether openly stated or kept tight-lipped in secret, we do.

What do they see?

A lot of people’s existence in the public eye is often a pseudo-image they wish to portray. Often, people want others to only see ‘their good side’. However, the good side might not be what’s truly on the inside. This juggling act is difficult for these people to maintain. Eventually their facade cracks and shatters, only to reveal the true person on the inside.

If you’re a person with solid self-confidence, without the added narcissistic attitude, others might view you as a successful person. Others might quietly despise you for being able to remain confident during turmoil. Some even hope to witness your failure and fall. And some of these individuals are family and so-called friends. Be aware and beware. Embracing one of these individuals will leave you with a knife in the back after you walk away.

If you lack self-confidence, take the necessary steps to construct a better you with an optimistic view for what you want to achieve in life.

Building self-confidence isn’t easy. One must learn to mentally brave stepping outside their comfort zones in order to achieve success. In most of life’s situations, we face rejection far more often than we gain acceptance. Developing rhinoceros skin over time aids one in continuing the pursuit of succeeding in their chosen market. That takes gumption. The fear of rejection and having been rejected the first time is what stops many from trying again. But, if you don’t try, you have succeeded in one thing: failure.

Overcoming the odds isn’t easy. Some view life as a competition, but the only true competition is with yourself. The race of life is filled with obstacles. The path each of us takes is our own. No one else runs in your stead. Others might be an obstacle, trying to hinder your success, but don’t allow them to sideline you. Keep moving forward. Take detours from these people whenever necessary. If these people are doing you more harm than good, such a detour IS necessary.

I’ve been fooled by people a lot in my life, believing their facades as genuine reflections of what they are inside. It hurts to be deceived and quite possibly this is why I have such a small circle of friends. My trust isn’t easily given because I’ve been burned by fake people. It’s hard to identify them immediately at times, but the clues are there if we’re not blinded by their charisma. Given time, the cracks allow a brief glimpse of what these people truly are.

I’ve had coworkers in the past who ‘befriended’ me but without my knowledge these individuals were spreading lies about me to other workers, my students, and all the while pretended to be my friend while trying to poison my mind toward other coworkers. With devious smiles and delight, I’ve encountered these toxic people. I’ve also severed ties from them as well.

The image I convey to others is what comes from my heart. I never deceive others, but because I tend to not follow the flock, I’m often misunderstood. These misunderstandings cause others to spread rumors, and some of the rumors others have said about me are both amusing and shocking.

I try to live my life treating others as I’d like to be treated. I don’t rush into friendships because I don’t want to risk having my trust bruised by others.

As an instructor, my size and seldom-smiling face has intimidated some students on the first day of class because they view me as a daunting angry person. I cannot help my Grumpy Cat facial expression. One student had me for two courses during the same quarter. She looked at me with fear in her eyes when she sat in the first class. Before the class began, she whispered frantically to her friend beside her. I looked toward her and she fell silent. When I returned to getting the role together, she whispered again. Each time I looked at her, she stopped whispering immediately. I asked if something was wrong and she shook her head.

When she came to my second class that day, she nervously smiled at me when she went to her seat and said, “I’m so glad you’re a much nicer person than I thought you were going to be.”

I had to laugh.

This proves one thing: We cannot base our judgments about others based solely upon their exterior facial expressions.

What do others see when they look at you?

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